News Shorts

Message From The President of Queer Coded Media, LLC

Hello, The recent SCOTUS decision in the 303 Creative v. Elenis case has brought to light some powers that the Queercoded management team has not considered that they might have. If you do not accept the gay and transgender agendas, you cannot use this site. Because you already are using this site, you accept the… Continue reading Message From The President of Queer Coded Media, LLC

Nature · Science

Exclusive Interview: Sub Captain Stockton Rush in Hell

THE RIVER STYX, HELL–After the disastrous excursion of the submersible known as Titan, QueerCoded correspondent Charles Darwin was able to catch up with Stockton Rush, former owner of the private company OceanGate and Captain of Titan. A transcript follows: Transcript Charles Darwin: Good day! I must say that it is quite an honor to meet… Continue reading Exclusive Interview: Sub Captain Stockton Rush in Hell

Lifestyle · Opinion

The Other Side of the Aisle: Stranger’s Rights!

Editors note: Periodically we have submissions from those with competing views. As a balanced news source, we feel the need to share those views with our readership. by Brett Pettifogger, Esq. Today, I’m going to unfurl a fresh piece of jurisprudence – “Stranger’s Rights”. This groundbreaking theory seeks to protect the delicate sensitivities of modern… Continue reading The Other Side of the Aisle: Stranger’s Rights!

Fashion · Lifestyle

Target Replaces Queer Pride Merchandise with White Pride

ARLINGTON HEIGHTS, IL— Following right-wing agitators being whiny little bitches about American super-box chain Target selling LGBT+ branded merchandise again this year, Target has folded to pressure and is pulling some but not all of their queer-money-baiting merchandise. Reportedly, they’ve even come up with a less-controversial replacement: merch promoting white pride. “We want to do… Continue reading Target Replaces Queer Pride Merchandise with White Pride

Lifestyle

Top 11 Safe Places to Pee in Florida

ALLIGATOR CANYON, FL— Florida Dictator Governor Rhonda Santis has signed a new law stating that everyone must use the bathroom that corresponds with whatever bullshit the delivery doctors spouted, regardless of gender identity, what official documents state, appearance, or biological realities of the people in question. The law applies to restrooms in government-run areas, such… Continue reading Top 11 Safe Places to Pee in Florida

Lifestyle · Politics

Nebraska Does Something Terrible To Trans People, Again

In a groundbreaking move to cure all societal ills, Nebraska’s Governor Pillen has signed a law that will ban all treatments for gender dysphoria in the Midwest. The legislation, dubbed the “Just Pick a Side Already Act,” is the brainchild of the governor’s personal council of wizards, who assured him that this was the fastest… Continue reading Nebraska Does Something Terrible To Trans People, Again

News Shorts

Journalist Justifies Transphobia With His Weird Ass Porn Collection

WASHINGTON D.C. — A journalist, while having lunch with a colleague, scrolled through his personal cloud-based storage collection of 1.23 terabytes of transgender pornography, narrating what he saw. Wednesday, Jesse Señalar, 40, insisted his transphobic writings are justified with the perversions portrayed in his personal pornography collection. Señalar, who works as a “journalist” who primarily… Continue reading Journalist Justifies Transphobia With His Weird Ass Porn Collection

Politics

Missouri Moves to Ban Puberty for Individuals Under 25

JEFFERSON CITY, MO–A long and contentious debate in the Missouri House of ended with a partisan vote to adopt a measure that appears to ban puberty for all individuals under the age of 25. House Member Jason Bean, who has nothing suspicious in his Google search history, introduced the bill to widespread condemnation. However, an… Continue reading Missouri Moves to Ban Puberty for Individuals Under 25

Lifestyle · Sports

NASCAR Makes All Cars Turn Right in Nod to Conservative Fans

INDIANAPOLIS, IN–In an attempt to reconnect to a flagging fan-base and declining revenue, NASCAR has prepared made a fundamental change to the sport, literally turning everything around. In the past, cars have made left turns in circles throughout the races. However, starting in 2024, cars will be made to turn right in order to appeal… Continue reading NASCAR Makes All Cars Turn Right in Nod to Conservative Fans