Lottie Durham has been working on a screenplay for years. Several, in fact.

She’s drafted a sci-fi murder mystery that takes place on Uranus. She wrote a lesbian, Mesozoic-era period piece. Her buddy cop comedy pairs a centaur and an anthropomorphic cactus.

But for SOME REASON, Hollywood won’t give her a million dollars and a lifetime contract for success. 

That’s why Lottie has decided to look to the porn industry to make ends meet. A popular “plan B” for failed actors, Lottie thought “meh, why not?”

“An Oscar isn’t gonna happen for me at this point. Hell, a Golden Globe also won’t happen for me. But that doesn’t mean an AVN can’t” said Durham, who sits at a keyboard, poring over a script featuring a gang-bang among one of those mass-suicide cults. “I mean, porn has dialogue, a story. We’ve seen the pizza boy, we’ve seen the weird stepmom stuff. SOMEONE is writing this stuff, and it might as well be me.”

Durham hopes that she can bring her unappreciated screenwriting skills to an industry that can desperately benefit from some creativity. She has already sent out a draft of her feature pornographic film “Three Blowjobs Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” which sheds a light on the modern justice system through gripping, regional dialogue juxtaposed with a series of oral sex scenes.

When approached with the notion that it’s possible many pornographic film actors improvise their dialogue, Durham responded “honestly, that’s fine too. I’m a graduate of the Second City in Chicago. I’m qualified to coach them. I spent several thousand dollars learning to be funny.”

Lottie supplied QueerCoded with her latest draft: sketch comedy “but, like, with sex.”