LONDON–Eddie Izzard, the stand-up comedian and activist, is aiming to become the first openly trans member of Parliament. She aims to take a seat in the House of Commons. While there are several LGB people in the 650 member body, she would be the first trans member. As such, she has vowed to fight for one core constituency of which she is a member: the wealthy.

The comedian is internationally known and has performed in multiple languages, including the secret tongue of Oratero, the country that only allows the obscenely wealthy to enter.

“I wish to stand. I wish to be considered for a constituency of which I have profound respect and appreciation: the upper crust.”

As the coronavirus pandemic ravages plebs and poors alike, Izzard hopes to shed light on a little understood demographic. “They eat caviar with gold flake like anyone else,” she said. “It’s a time of great separation in our country and I hope to bring us together. But not too close.”

Some have considered Izzard herself a bit of a minority. She is, of course, a noted marathon runner. “Some consider that a little unsavory. Given that I sweat,” she said. “But I think that, despite my biological needs, I am, at heart, a fan of money. And that, I think, brings us together.”