Best. Job. Ever.
QueerCoded’s top-notch staff have compiled this list of Amazing Jobs to exploit sucker into helping you transition.
We’ll also have a bonus list of jobs to avoid for those of you who really love lists
1. Software Programming
Best thing here is that programming experience is not required; all you need to do is know how to copy and paste from Stack Overflow.
2. Call Center Customer Service Rep
Certainly not for the feint of heart, this kind of mind numbing and pointless job entails working for someone that probably has a cocaine problem and with a woman who demands to bring in her stuffed animals. But if you do it right, you can make this work. And by “do it right,” we mean “show up and be competent.” And by “be competent” we mean “don’t swear at people.”
3. International Coffee Shop Barista
Only valid for employees of a certain burnt coffee emporium.
4. OnlyFans Cam Girl
This is quickly fading as OnlyFans attempts to rebrand into a “safe for work” kind of company, but you still might be able to get a couple people with a penchant for purchasing pics!
5. Package Delivery Person
Pre-op trans women might have an advantage here, as this job may entail peeing in a bottle.
6. Prisoner
Not to say we actually recommend this, but if one was to, say, murder a couple of transphobes, and get sent to a maximum-security penitentiary, the Supreme Court has upheld that they must pay for gender-related care. Warning: this one doesn’t come without risks, but then again so do the others.
7. Governor of California
Hey, you can’t be any worse than…. Well no need to get into that, you know what we’re talking about. Don’t worry if you don’t know much about politics; that’s apparently not a qualification.
Bonus: Three Jobs To Avoid
1. Noise Musician
The noise music scene just hasn’t been the same.
2. Governor of California
Turns out you may already need money before embarking on this one.
3. Writer for online LGBTQ-themed humor site
You’re not going to get rich, here, buddy. [Hey, wait!–ed]